Tweets

    chinese-zeus:

    lollipops are so weird youre literally swallowing your own flavored saliva

    raikagay:

    remember like 2 years ago when christmas stopped feeling like christmas for some reason

    bakrua:

    bewbin:

    Why do people drink alcohol it tastes disgusting

    you don’t drink it for the taste. u drink shit like apple juice for the taste. you drink alcohol to get rid of the bad taste that every awful person in your life has left

    swanqueenidiot:

    Okay so the Colbert Report posted a link to the Ellen Page interview, right

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    And I was already happy it was a fan favorite. But THE COMMENTS

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    I MEAN

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    IT’S JUST TOO GREAT

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    ADAM AND EVE NOT ADAM AND MAPLE LEAF


    (Source: thespookymissioner)

    baconsloth:

    deoxyhemoglobin:

    I was chatting with a donor before I drew his blood, and he was a dentist. when I actually drew him, there was just a little squirt of blood and it surprised him

    I looked him in they eye and told him “you’re bleeding because you don’t floss”

    and he went dead silent

    had the opportunity and fucking seized it

    heislikefireburningthroughtime:

    my mum just told me to “stop being so depressed all the time”

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    (Source: wiiiinchester)

    gamsee:

    today this white girl asked me why my hair is so curly and i said im black and she told me to say african american

    You can’t keep dancing with the devil and ask why you’re still in hell
    Something my friend told me the other day (via dolly-kitten)

    (Source: sad-theater)

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